Aint Nobody Fresha

Allow me to introduce y'all to my clique, my posse, my peeps, my crew, my entourage, mi amigos, my people. (I'm extremely gangster so that sentence should be read in the most G voice you can conjure  Also, if I could go all Mark Zuckerberg on your asses and code or html or whatever that shit is to make "Clique" by Jay-z, Kanye, and Big Sean play in the background of this post, that would be happening.)

**Disclaimer: These people are complete freakshows, but their my freakshows and I'm obsessed with them. You're going to hear about them constantly. Sorry bout chya.**

Betches and Decks - I present to you my sibbesties:

E

(Yes, this is who set examples for me as a child. You're understanding why I am this way more and more)

This David Bowie lookin' ass is my seester Erin. She is more fashion forward than you or I could ever hope to be, she's got a laugh that is more contagious than that horrific Matt Damon movie, and she can write the muthaeff out of anything. Girls got skillz to pay billz folks.

Mr. & Mrs. S

This vision in aquamarine is my bro-tres, The Skiz, The Doctah. J+E joined #teammarriage like 4-seconds ago (try a month) and Justin is pretty much the most badass, low-key hi-larious dude on the planet. Homeboy can make fun of you and you don't even realize its happening. He's the effing Chuck Norris of sly jokes. Needless to say he fits in just fine.

Kay

Most of you know this ghetto-fab lady. Note the deuces she's chuckin' up as she strangles a friggin' puppy. Don't be deceived by Life After, this bitch will cut you. Just kidding...sorta. Kay has kicked motherhood in the balls she's so good at it, is going to save the world after she finishes her MSW, and can drink tequila like no other 5'4" blondemonster I know.

The "M" Posse

(These two know how to make a pretty baby. I mean, C'MON!)

That guy up there in the ugly green zip up? (Go Irish!) Bro Dos. John. The original BIL. Let me tell you about the bombtastic breakfasts this man makes. I mean, its all fun and games til you can't button your pants. He also pretty much dealt with me playing Uncle Jesse for a year as I practically lived at his house, he plays guitar and has a voice that's a mixture of Fergie and Jesus (he'll deny it) and he watches at least 4 rounds of SportsCenter a day. This guy just gets me.

Seany Pat

This muthah right here? Sean. You will never be as cool as him, stop trying now. Brosef has killer taste in music, is from the other side of the country but Cali Swags ankle socks, tanks on tanks on tanks, and keds like he's freakin' Rob Kardashian, and - despite the pube salad he rocks on his face constantly - pulls, like, the hottest chicks ever. I don't get it. But I do cuz he's the bomb.com. FoSho.

So there they are folks. The five most bombass individuals on the planet. I miss these jackwagons something terrible in my new cit-ay, but google group chats, text, gchat help make me feel like they are never too far. You know you're one lucky sonofabitch when your brothers and sisters are your best friends.

Boomsauce.